STATEMENT ON APPLICATION OF SUZANNE MILLS FOR PARTY MEMBERSHIP

Dearest beloved brother and sister comrades, it is my pleasure to announce that the application of Suzanne Mills, formerly of the Party Hearty, for Parted Hearty party membership has been approved by the Parted Hearty screening committee after her spectacular decision to cross the floor!

With immediate effect therefore:

AMENDMENT TO THE CONSTITUTION OF THE PARTED HEARTY

 

1. The Parted Hearty shall now be lead by new political leader Suzanne Mills;

 

2. The Parted Hearty shall, forthwith, be immediately re-absorbed into the PARTY HEARTY;

 

3. Therefore, the Parted Hearty shall now be synonomous with the Party Hearty and, in this way, the Parted Hearty political leader will also be re-installed as Party Hearty leader.

 

4. These resolutions shall be final and binding upon all and sundry.

 

 

Signed at Croton House

 

DEPUTY FOR BACHANNALIAN AFFAIRES

Report on the Parted Hearty's mass rally

THOUSANDS turned up in their numbers at the Hollows, Queens Park Savannah last week Saturday to hear the special announcement made by Parted Hearty instigator Andre Bagoo over the stunning decision of Party Hearty political leader Suzanne Mills to cross the floor, leaving her beloved Party Hearty to join the Parted Hearty in protest over the tenure of the deputy leader of internet affairs IT Ken Chee. (Full statement is below).

Here is a selection of some more wonderful photos from the event:

 

 

EMERGENCY STATEMENT

Further to our previous statement, the Parted Hearty takes note of a statement from the Party Hearty (PH) political leader Suzanne Chee indicating that she intends to cross the floor. The Parted Hearty welcomes this development and will take immediate steps to walk towards the convening of a meeting of the Member Ship Committee in order to launch a screening process for the former Party Hearty political leader to determine the outcome of her membership application and what Cabal post she will take within the Parted Hearty. An announcement will be made at a mass rally at the Hollows, Queen's Park Savannah, on Saturday at 6pm. ALL ROADS LEAD TO THE HOLLOWS!

Long-awaited Parted Hearty (PHd) statement in response to statement of Party Hearty (PH) leader Suzanne Mills

DONE DEAL: Deputy leader for IT affairs signs off on a rainbow unity accord on Friday at the Crown Plaza Hotel, St Ann's. Photo courtesy the official photographer of the Parted Hearty.

In light of the innumerable requests for comments which we have been flooded with ever since Party Hearty (PH) political leader Suzanne Mills on Friday morning issued a statement on our formation, the Parted Hearty (PHd) hereby issues this statement:

 

STATEMENT FROM THE PARTED HEARTY (APPROVED BY THE CENTRAL EXECUTIVE, THE CABAL, THE SUB-COMMITTEE ON RIGHTS, THE FORUM FOR MOBILISATION, THE MEMBERSHIP COMMITTEE, THE LEADERSHIP SECRETARIAT, THE TEA LADIES AT HEADQUARTERS, AMONG OTHERS)

1. The political leader has spoken. Discipline requires that we speak no further.

2. We have, however, a few more words to add. The Parted Hearty remains committed to the Party Hearty constitution and its spirit. We have never left the party. With all due respect to the political leader we are not a "breakaway faction" of "miscreants" with "one foot in and one foot out", "corrupted" by fame. We are a wing of the party. Not leg, thigh or side-breast. Wing.

3. Claims that the Parted Hearty (PHd) triggered the resignation of the Party Hearty chairman and deputy leader of IT affairs are based on a fundamental misunderstanding and misinterpretation of some of the basic words of the English language. At no point in time did the PHd express any animosity toward the deputy in question. We completely support his Facebook page. We NEVER said we did not like his performance in his tenure as deputy of IT affairs. We have always been a big fan of how he managed to add a certain je ne sais qua to the Facebook page. The Facebook page is amazing! It does us proud on the international stage. This mal-interpretation of our Constitution was the work of spiteful third-party mongrels who misrepresented what was said in our Constitution. These wajangs and hooligans want to mash up the Parted Hearty by claiming we want to mash up the Party Hearty. As a result, with immediate effect, Parted Hearty will immediately re-instate the DELEGATE system for our internal polls to restore confidence in our democratic traditions.

Yours Ever,

Deputy of Bacchanal Affairs

on behalf of all pillars of the wing

Whither Party Hearty

The following statement is today issued by the Party Hearty political leader (and therefore also the Parted Hearty (PHd) leader) Suzanne Mills:

Good Friday morning to you my fellow citizens of Trinidad and Tobago. It is with heavy heart and flat foot that I speak to you today. As you know, it was only a couple of weeks ago that I had the pleasure to announce the return of the people´s most popular party, Party Hearty, after a hiatus of five and a half years from the political landscape of Trinidad and Tobago. My hopes for PH and thus for TT, were high, as I felt certain that we would be our old merry, colourful selves, bringing a certain je ne sais quoi to the 2013 local government elections.

But nation, today I must share with you the gravest news. I was naïve. In the near six-year year interval some of our members seemed to have been seduced by the bacchanal that passes for politics in this great nation of ours. Harmony has been replaced by deep discord and we no longer Party Hearty. There are rogue elements in our midst, rogues who waited for me, their leader, to be absent from PH headquarters in Port-of-Spain to launch their coup. I was gone for only one day, but that was all it took for all hell to break loose. It is my belief that the timing of the mutiny was crucial: the first shots were fired no sooner had we completed our screening of candidates.

Nation, it saddens me to have to report that the rogues have formed a breakaway faction, corrupting the PH name and our dream of a peaceful fetetocracy. Calling themselves the Parted Hearty, they hope to confuse the electorate. The cause of the mutiny: some of the PH members were against the creation of a PH Facebook site, accusing PH of selling out to the corporate social media. They wanted an independent blog.

As leader I felt that I should not let my personal dislike of Facebook influence the party´s decision so I withdrew from the discussion, leaving in charge the party´s popular chairman who is also deputy leader of IT affairs and the PH candidate for the Port -of-Spain City Corporation. As soon as I turned my back, the blog faction turned on him.

This group of miscreants now has the gall to steal our constitution while calling itself the conscience of the party and it has posted online a motion attacking the now former PH chairman/deputy leader. It reads and I quote in part, “WHEREAS the tenure of the Party Hearty (PH)’s Deputy Political Leader for Internet Affairs has resulted in the embarrassing launch of a Facebook page on April 23, in the year of Our Lord Two Thousand and Thirteen, which has the tendency to bring the international reputation of the Party Hearty (PH) into disrepute; WHEREAS a group of core grassroots members of Party Hearty (PH) have decided to resign from the party in light of the aforementioned; WHEREAS this group – hereafter the Parted Hearty (PHd) wing – intend to be the ‘conscience of the Party Hearty...”

So you see nation what has transpired. I say to you today, that knowing it might not have sufficient clout to go it solo, PHd intends to keep one foot in and one foot out, use PH ideas while issuing damning releases. Such behaviour is a carbon COPy of one of the country´s political entities and can only bring PH into disrepute. We are known for our limes, not for being a bunch of lemons.

It goes without saying that the egregious attacks on his reputation have prompted the resignation of the aggrieved party chairman who has written to me a pithy letter, the contents of which I now feel compelled to reveal to you. “I have resigned as party chairman and IT specialist. I go remain ah ordinary member. I go hold ah meeting in PoS and buss mark on allyuh leff write and centaur.”

Whither Party Hearty you might well ask. To save the party, I intend to try to mend fences by taking us back to our roots, to a simpler time before Facebook and blogs, when PH handed out pholourie in order to win the popular vote. We have allowed power, fame and the Internet to corrupt our fundamental principles of free for all fete, party and lime and in so doing we may have turned an imaginary party into a real one.

partyheartytt@gmail.com

Facebook address: partyhearty

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